Good tennis players are those who beat other tennis players, and a good shot during play is one the opponent can't return. But that's not a truth about life or excellence -- it's a truth about tennis. We've created an artificial structure in which one person can't succeed without doing so at someone else's expense, and then we accuse anyone who prefers other kinds of activities of being naive because "there can be only one best -- you're it or you're not, " as the teacher who delivered that much-admired you're-not-special commencement speech declared. You see the sleight of hand here? The question isn't whether everyone playing a competitive game can win or whether every student can be above average. Of course they can't. The question that we're discouraged from asking is why our games are competitive -- or our students are compulsively ranked against one another -- in the first place. Alfie Kohn
I don't remember who said this, but there really are places in the heart you don't even know exist until you love a child.
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Anne Lamott
Your kids require you most of all to love them for who they are, not to spend your whole time trying to correct them.
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Bill Ayers
That's the nature of being a parent, Sabine has discovered. You'll love your children far more than you ever loved your parents, and -- in the recognition that your own children cannot fathom the depth of your love -- you come to understand the tragic,...
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Ursula Hegi
My father gave me the greatest gift anyone could give another person, he believed in me.
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Jim Valvano
While I was drying off Maddie after her bath tonight, she said, 'I love you' to me for the first time. It sounded like 'All lub boo, ' but I didn't care. To reciprocate, I showed her what an ex- Marine looks like when he...
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Jim Beaver
More Quotes By Alfie Kohn
Students get the message bout what adults want. When 4th graders in a variety of classroomswere asked what their teachers most wanted them to do, they didn't say, "Ask thoughtful questions" or "Make responsible decisions" or Help others." They said, "Be quiet, don't fool around,...
Many of our elected officials have virtually handed the keys to our schools over to corporate interests. Presidential commissions on education are commonly chaired by the executives of large companies.
The more we want our children to be (1) lifelong learners, genuinely excited about words and numbers and ideas, (2) avoid sticking with what’s easy and safe, and (3) become sophisticated thinkers, the more we should do everything possible to help them forget about grades.
Like any other tool for facilitating the completion of a questionable task, rewards offer a "how" answer to what is really a "why" question.
How well you do things should be incidental, not integral, to the way you regard yourself.
